How to Plan a Wedding That Actually Feels Like You
Don’t be afraid to go against the grain and include your favourite things in your wedding.
Written by Melissa Woods
It all starts with who you are, not what you’ve seen.
If you’re here, you’re probably already questioning what your wedding “should” look like. I’ve been there, and if you’ve followed my story since the start, you’ll know that Ben and I ended up having a way more traditional wedding than either of us really are because we listened to everyone else!
Maybe the Pinterest boards don’t feel like you. And no doubt, endless content and family opinions are making things harder, not easier. You're trying to figure out how to plan a wedding but using a traditionally rigid format which doesn’t reflect anything real about your life, your values, and your relationship. Am I right?
Here’s the truth… and I wish someone had said this to me… you don’t need to follow a formula. You’re allowed to do what you want. It’s your wedding. No one else’s.
Scrap the Script
Most "wedding traditions" don’t reflect the diverse lives we lead today. And many of them are deeply gendered, heteronormative, and unnecessary.
You're allowed to make your own traditions.
You can spend the night together… walk in together… write your own vows… swap champagne toasts for your favourite cocktail… wear trainers... wear nothing at all! The point is to be authentically you.
All traditions can be replaced with your favourite alternative.
Work With People Who Get You
The suppliers you book for your wedding really matter. They’re not just providing a service, they’re helping you tell your story.
The Book Of Love is a directory we created for exactly this reason: to connect you with the florists, photographers, designers, celebrants etc who believe in creating something personal, not just beautiful. And they’re ready to help you bring that to life, without judgment or assumptions.
When your supplier team is aligned with your values and vision, planning becomes a collaboration and your wedding will never be replicated because you are at the heart of it.
Prioritise What Matters To You
You don’t need to tick all the boxes associated with weddings.
You don’t need a six-tier cake… you don’t need favours… you don’t need anything that you don’t particularly care about… and you don’t even need everyone to understand your choices.
All you need is a sense of clarity about what matters to you. Go big on these things and the impact will be felt so much more than when you try to cover everything.
Think Beyond Aesthetics
Weddings are often designed to be looked at. You’ve seen the mood boards - colour palettes, tablescapes, outfits, lighting. All of it beautiful. All of it curated. But ask a bigger question - What do we want this to feel like?
A wedding that only looks good in photos might not feel good in the moment. And that’s what stays with you… the energy, the flow, the emotion, the presence of your people. That’s what you'll remember in years to come.
Think in terms of experience. What kind of atmosphere do you want to create? How do you want to feel, and how do you want your guests to feel? Because when things feel good, they always look good anyway!
Phot by Lisa Jane Photography
At Make New Traditions, we’ve never been interested in replicating the industry. We’re here for the wild, quiet, celebratory, rebellious, deeply personal ways people choose to commit to each other. Whether that looks like a festival in the woods, a warehouse rave, or a small gathering in the backyard - it’s still a wedding - it’s your wedding.